Who's Really in the Crate?

The dog's going to Hawaii but not me.

Hawaii! I'd rather be there than almost anywhere. I'm tired of the rain and I'm sick of hunching over because I'm so cold.

I want to go back and swim with a big sea turtle at Honauma Bay, shop cheaply for exotic food at the Navy Exchange, ride bikes in the warm breezy air and get color on my skin instead of rain. I don't know what the dog's preferences are but as long as there are smells to sniff and treats now and then, he seems pretty happy wherever he is, even his little crate.

Okay, it's my daughter's dog and since she lives in Hawaii, she should have her little dog. He's very cute, which is a good thing because if he weren't, he wouldn't be worth the ridiculous amount of money and effort it takes to get a dog to the 50th state. It's part of our own country -- so why so many fees, health certifications and blood tests, and quarantine?

I was almost close to paying down my credit card, or maybe not close but getting it under control. Now it's back on a plastic diet.

I spent $208 at the Vet to get the paperwork filled out, $170 to the Department of Agriculture so they'll process the Vet's paperwork, and $38 to FedEx the paperwork. That's just today and that's just paperwork.

I've lost track of all the bloodwork fees, examination fees, vaccinations and certifications required for a dog to take a 5-hour trip. My daughter will reimburse me someday, but I didn't want her to have to reimburse me, ever. Now it's not a choice. The dog's permanent vacation will be on my card for a while. I'll be a little jealous every time I look at my balance.

I still haven't paid off my own trip to Hawaii. We did all the tourist things like hike up Diamond Head and the Aiea Loop trail, which my daughter hadn't done even though she lived less than ten miles away. When you live somewhere, you don't enjoy the things people from somewhere else go out of their way to do. I know Multnomah Falls is close. That's why I don't have to go.

I'd feel fine about all this if I were taking the dog myself. It'd be an excuse to go. I'd look forward to the freakin' paperwork. Instead, we'll be a little lonelier without the little doggie and a little annoyed every time I look at my credit balance.

He probably won't ever swim with a big sea turtle, either.